Is Your Body Out of Shape

Is Your Body Out of Shape

I feel like my body has got totally out of shape, so I got my doctor’s permission to join a fitness club and start exercising. I decided to take an aerobics class for seniors. I bent, twisted, gyrated, jumped up and down and perspired for an hour. But, by the time I got my leotards on, the class was over.

15 Reasons Why I Like Retirement !

As we age we tend to lose our sense of humor

Question:     How many days in a week?
Answer:       6 Saturdays, 1 Sunday.

Question:     When is a retiree’s bedtime?
Answer:       Two hours after falling asleep on the couch.

Question:     How many retirees does it take to change a light bulb?
Answer:       Only one but it might take all day.

Question:     What’s the biggest gripe of retirees?
Answer:       There is not enough time to get everything done.

Question:     Why don’t retirees mind being called Seniors?
Answer:       The term comes with a 10% discount.

Question:     Among retirees, what is considered formal attire?
Answer:       Tied shoes.

Question:     Why do retirees count their pennies?
Answer:       They are the only ones who have the time.

Question:     What is the common term for someone who enjoys work and refuses to retire?
Answer:       NUTS!

Question:     Why are retirees so slow to clean out the basement, attic or garage?
Answer:       They know that as soon as they do, one of their adult kids will want to store stuff there.

Question:     What do retirees call a long lunch?
Answer:       Normal.

Question:     What is the best way to describe retirement?
Answer:       The never-ending Coffee Break.

Question:     What’s the biggest advantage of going back to school as a retiree?
Answer:       If you cut classes, no one calls your parents.

Question:     Why does a retiree often say he doesn’t miss work but misses the people he used to work with?
Answer:       He is too polite to tell the whole truth.

QUESTION:   What do you do all week?
Answer:        Monday through Friday, NOTHING.  Saturday & Sunday, I rest.

And, my very favourite….

Question:     Do you want to know how to prevent sagging?
Answer:       Just eat till the wrinkles fill out.

 


 

THE SENILITY PRAYER :    

Grant me the senility to forget the people I never liked anyway,

The good fortune to run into the ones I do,

and the eyesight to tell the difference.

 


Always Remember This:
You don’t stop laughing because you grow old,
You grow old because you stop laughing!